Deprecated function: Array and string offset access syntax with curly braces is deprecated in include_once() (line 20 of /home/gravitym/public_html/includes/file.phar.inc).
Rumor has it, Gerry went to a concert that was supposed to feature guitar legend Eddie Van Halen AND guitar virtuoso Steve Vai. However, just before the show, the two couldn’t agree on who would walk on stage first, so a rumble broke out between Steve and his guys and Eddie and his guys. Needless to say, by the end of it, neither one of them wanted anything to do with each other OR the concert. But the REAL trouble didn’t start until the MC walked out and told the crowd of 25,000 rabid superfan shred-heads that the concert wasn’t going to happen. The place went CRAZY. So Gerry knew what he had to do. Earlier, he’d noticed the triple neck guitar Steve used in the Just Like Paradise video on a stand near the drums. Gerry jumped up on stage, grabbed the guitar, flung it around his neck and screamed to the band “Let’s DO THIS”. Gerry was already familiar with most of the fret scorching music Steve and Eddie were going to play, so he just grabbed a guitar neck with each hand and proceeded to play BOTH of their parts, including tons of mind-blowing shred harmonies. In only minutes, the audience had calmed down and just stood stunned for the rest of the evening. FOUR HOURS later, Gerry slid the guitar off, dropped it on the floor, and said low and cool “It’s what I do” as he walked past the speechless audience and out the door. Countless lives were saved that night –and thousands of faces were melted by his shredding.
I couldn’t recall any stories about Gerry, having only recently r̶e̶s̶e̶t̶ ̶t̶h̶e̶ ̶M̶a̶t̶r̶i̶x̶ forgotten a lot of things, so I googled “stories about Gerry”. All I came up with were stories about surfing, hiking the Appalachian trail, and leading revolts. So I logged off and went to bed. When I woke the next morning, and checked my email I had message that looked like spam, and wondered what site Jeff had entered my email address into this time. I almost deleted it, but something about the sender name “siro” intrigued me. I opened it. There was a link inviting me to a hidden subreddit titled “Legen-gerry”. I hesitantly clicked through…I spent most of the next day “working from home” wading through some of most hilarious, heart-wrenching, barely believable, and live-bear-able tales that have ever been told. Like the time that Gerry, in order to save one of his friends, put on a hula skirt costume, put his other friend on a roasting spit, and sang “If you're hungry for a hunk of fat and juicy meat, Eat my buddy Ossi here because he is a treat, Come on down and dine, On this tasty swine, All you have to do is get in line, Aaaare you achin' Foooor some bacon? Heeee's a big pig, You could be a big pig too.”
Jeff finally figured out my secret identity!! Except it was a FOUR neck guitar, here's the pic to prove it!
https://www.guitar-muse.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/04/batio-4-neck-guitar.jpg
Cool! Funny thing is, Michael Angelo Batio (seriously) WAS the guy who came to mind when I was writing about you playing both necks at the same time. That dude is awesome. Gimme Vai musically, but if I could play like either of them, it'd be all I'd do 24/7.
Comments
Jeff -
ossiukko -
Jeff -
sid -
Jeff -
ossiukko -
Tavros -
Jeff -
gerry -
Jeff -